3/29/10

Italian Swiss Colony - Old world charm meets old world charm.

Joke #1: Those who know good wine come to find it at the Italian Swiss Colony, nestled here in the storybook mountains of our parking lot...

Joke #2: In the late 1800s, a small group of Italian Swiss settled here in Asti, California. They were fleeing their war-torn homeland, which had endured years of war with the Australian Japanese, the Polish French, and the Mexican Russian Anglo Egyptians.

Joke #3: The Italian Swiss Colony donates 25% of their wine making proceeds to the Italian Swiss Research Fund, working to find a cure for colorblindness, and dressing like a Christmas ornament.

Joke #4: Hi. Italian Swiss Colony, right? I'm droppin' off a pair of multicolored sign gesturers for youse guys. Sign here and here, please. Okay... says here you paid for four hours' worth of gesturing, so we'll send a truck back at eleven to pick em up, which works out fine, cause they gotta go straight down to a car dealership in Riverside so they can point at some used corollas.

Joke #5: Italian Swiss Colony: For over fifty years, Making fine wine in the tradition of old Italian Swiss Colonia

Joke #6: ...so come on down to the Italian Swiss Colony, where the whole family can sample our fine selection of hand made wines, take in the the mountain scenery, and enjoy a hand crafted Italian Swiss Colonic.

Joke #7: Italian Swiss Colony: gesturing toward signs in Hansel and Gretel costumes for over fifty years.

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